The Freedom in Knowing That Life Is Not About Us

Article by Pastor Bobby Clark 

Of LightHouse Church CO

When we decided to follow Jesus as our Lord and Savor. One of the things the Bible and Jesus tells us Christians that we need to live a counter- culture life. Basically, what this means is to put it simply, we are no longer to the world's standards. But to the standards of God and His word. “Do not conform to the pattern of this world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.” Romans 12:2 (ESV). We are not to live to the patter of this world. Or conform to what the world says is right. But when we give our life to Christ our mind must be transformed to the standards that God says is important and what He says is right. There are many examples of this everywhere in today’s world. Like, what the world thinks true happiness is vs what God's word says happiness is. Or what the world says power and strength is, vs what God says power and strength looks like. You can even apply this to current hot button topics like abortion, what a family should look like, and so on. However, for this article I want to look at the fact that it is not about us but all about Jesus Christ. As well as the freedom one can find in this fact once you accept it. 

The reason why I felt driven to write this article, is because of how strange this statement will sound for most people. That is because of how counterculture this idea really is. Think about it, if you were on the street and I ran up to you. And told you that there is freedom in knowing that life is not about you, but all about Jesus. You would think I was some strange Christian nut (which I might be). However, we live in a world that tells us since we are young that life is all about us. Or at least it should be all about us. Now granted we all might have voices in our lives that tell us that life is not about us, or something like it. However, like I said before, for most of us it feels like we are beaten with the promise that life should be all about us. This is, however, just not the case.  Especially for us who are proclaiming to be Christ followers. Once we become followers of Christ, we are essentially saying it is all about Jesus and His well. But we will talk more about that later. 

When we explore the idea of life not being about us. We can see that those who have the mindset that life is all about them have a lot of negative side effects. One of the first effects of this idea is that it can easily turn that person into a highly egotistical and prideful person. I am sure we have all dealt with egotistical and prideful people. It’s not a lot of fun. Most of the time these people are cold, rude, always thinking about themselves, usually they never think they are at fault, always blaming others, and so on. Now you might be sitting there saying to yourself, “yeah, I hate those types of people. But we need to remember we can easily turn into those types of prideful and egotistical people. Or we can currently be that way. The Bible says this about pride and ego. “Everyone who is arrogant in heart is an abomination to the Lord; be assured, he will not go unpunished.” Proverbs 16:5 (ESV). This is a really harsh translation, but it is clear. God does not like those who are arrogant, prideful, or egotistical. Going even further by saying that this type of behavior is an abomination and will not go unpunished. But why does God dislike a prideful heart so much? I think a lot of the time it's because a prideful heart can cause people to think that they do not need God or that they are as great as God. And we have seen how that turns out… Not very good. Like everyone they still have a chance to repent. However, as I said before, a lot of prideful and egotistical people do not believe that they need to repent. The author of proverbs goes on to say, “Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall.” Proverbs 16:18 (ESV). Basically, if a prideful person does not repent, God will give them over to their sins. This is why the mindset of life is all about me is so dangerous.  

The second negative side effect we see from thinking life is all about you, is that it alienates and isolates you from others. Like I said before, no one wants to be around someone who is prideful. The main reason for this is because the most important person in your life is yourself. This causes you to put your needs before everyone else's. Even if it puts others at risk. Side note this does not mean that they do not care about others. But, it does mean that most of the time they do put their needs first. This causes people to feel like they might be unimportant to you, or less than you are. This will cause them to slowly draw away from you, until they have left completely. Now people might always be drawn to you, however after time they will start leaving as well. This makes me think of the saying, “it is lonely at the top.” This sounds like it comes from someone who thinks life is all about them. And the reason it is so lonely is they push everyone away. I myself enjoy my alone time, but I also know I need people in my life to support me, encourage me, to tell me the truth, and to push me to become better. Let alone it doesn't just alienate and isolate you from others, but it alienates and isolates you from God as well. As I said before this is because you do not believe you need God and His help. You began to think that every blessing you have in life is solely because of what you have done. The truth is a lot of times that is not true at all. “Whoever isolates himself seeks his own desire; he breaks out against all sound judgment.” Proverbs 18:1 (ESV) As this verse says there is no sound judgment, and all they try to do is seek their own desire. Which ends in a meaningless life. But, when we seek God’s desires which is for everyone to be saved by what Jesus did on the cross. We have meaning and a life worth living. Let me put it another way. The one who thinks life is all about them isolates themselves from God and ends up getting swallowed up by their own sin. That’s why to quote Proverbs 16:18 again, ““Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall.” Again, being isolated from others and God is a slow and painful way to live a life. 

The last side effect that I want to talk about that comes from thinking life is all about yourself. Is that it creates a false reality. Now this might sound harsh and a little untrue. I apologize for that but think about it. Nothing points to life about being all about us. But people with this mindset create false narratives where life is all about them. Thinking of simple interactions like someone smiling at them or holding a door open for them is because they are so great. Or being good at something means they are great at everything. You see these things can begin to warp one's reality. And this can cause the person to treat others wrongly, or think that they are above the law, or so long. In this reality, the person is the hero. This is a typical thing most addicts will do. It might seem harsh to call someone who thinks life is all about them an addict. However, they are more or less addicted to themselves. (And the truth is we are all addicted to something.) This false reality can cause a lot of damage not just to those who think life is all about them, but as I said before to those around them as well. 

As you can see, the mindset of thinking the world is all about you is truly a prison that can ruin one's life. But there is freedom. And there are really three things you must do. The first us recognize the problem or that you have a problem. If you have been around any recovery meeting, this might sound like it comes from the 12 steps of a 12 step program. Thats most recovery groups have it as their first step. I’m biased towards Celebrate Recovery created by John Baker and Rick Warren. Which says God is the only way someone can truly get freedom from any addictions, hurts, or hang ups. Celebrate Recovery step one says, “We admitted we were powerless over our addictions and compulsive behaviors, that our lives had become unmanageable.” We need to admit that we have a problem thinking that life is all about us. And once we do this. We go into step two of Celebrate Recovery, “We came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.”  To put this all together. We first realize that we have a problem. Which is that we think that life is all about us. Then we begin to humble ourselves, by understanding life if not all about us. We then reach out to God to restore us by accepting what Jesus did on the cross, and by allowing God to wash and transform our mind. This is where Romans 12:2 comes into play again. These things do not happen all at once. It definitely takes time to heal from thinking life is all about us. And any other addiction, habit, or hangup we might have. I believe the reason for this is to see how much faith in God we truly have in God. He will heal us; we just need to have faith that he will.

The last way we get freedom from knowing that life is not about us, is by recognizing who life is really about. Which life should be all about Jesus Christ. This is because he is not only one of the three personalities of God. But, because of Jesus Christ and what he did on the cross. We should be completely devoted to Jesus and His well. We should also love Jesus completely. In other words, Jesus should be the center of our life. That way we can continue to keep our eyes on the cross. Now that does not mean we don't focus on our kids, or even do things for ourselves every now again. But, we do it in the hope as a way to worship God and Jesus. If we remain focused on Jesus. Because he is worthy of being the center of our life. Then we will receive true meaning for our life, and true heavenly joy. This also allows us to remain on the mission field, even when things get rough. 

In closing, as I said Jesus is worthy of our praise. Way more worthy than we are. This is because Jesus has done so much for us. As well as being perfect of any sin. Jesus is not out for Himself or his own personal gain. Jesus loves the world so much that He wants to give everyone a chance to be saved from the dark web of sin. “16 “For God so loved the world,[a] that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life. 17 For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him.” John 3:16-17 (ESV) This is the god we would all strive to worship and praise. Today, take a moment and evaluate your life, to see if you are living a life that is all about you or all about Jesus.